


The Nicknaming Incident

by meowzipan



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Swapfell (Undertale), Alternate Universe - Underfell (Undertale), Alternate Universe - Underswap (Undertale), Characterization practice, Gen, Papyrus Underfell is a prima-donna, Sibling Banter, Swapfell Papyrus smokes weed, drug usage, i'm honestly not sure how to tag this one, not confusing at all, practice with group conversations, so does underswap papyrus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-08-05
Packaged: 2020-07-31 14:54:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20116909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meowzipan/pseuds/meowzipan
Summary: “the names'r gonna be stupid,” Sans muttered, shaking his skull.“IF YOU'RE GOING TO BE SO PESSIMISTIC,” Sans piped up from his armchair, rolling his eye lights, “THEN WHY DON'T YOU JUST LET US DECIDE THE NICKNAMES, WHILE YOU GO... HAVE YOUR NAP?” he finished his statement uncertainly, and Sans growled at him, narrowing his sockets as he whipped his skull around.“i don't need a fuckin' nap,” he snapped viciously.





	The Nicknaming Incident

**Author's Note:**

> this is just a silly thing i typed up a while ago to practice writing the alternate versions of The Boys.  
i wasn't originally going to post it, but i read it earlier and decided to just go for it.  
the characterizations aren't exactly final, i'm just trying to familiarize myself with them!

“I THINK WE SHOULD SETTLE THIS CONFUSING NAME SITUATION,” Sans was saying from the doorway, his other counterparts already draped around the room in various locations.

He was holding himself up primly as he marched inside, hands behind his back in a formal parade rest as he took his place near the wall and next to the television, as if he were leading a meeting. Sans looked almost gleeful in his amusement on the couch, sinking into his blue hoodie and slumped against the cushions comfortably. By his side was Sans, glaring tiredly as he slumped against the arm rest, his skull cradled in his palm, and yet another Sans was sitting up straight in the armchair nearest to the door, blue-gloved hands clasped in his lap as he gazed at Sans with an alert attention.

“I AGREE!” he chirped, as soon as Sans stopped moving, “IT WOULD BE MUCH EASIER IF WE ALL JUST HAD A NICKNAME.”

“PRECISELY!” Sans exclaimed emphatically, violet gaze settling on Sans for a moment before he looked to the two Sans who were occupying the couch. “WHICH IS WHY I HAD THE FORETHOUGHT TO CALL THIS MEETING. NOW–”

Papyrus appeared abruptly at that moment, falling straight out of the void and into the unoccupied armchair at the other end of the couch, sprawling out on it sideways. He blinked at the assembled Sans, violet eye lights settling on each of them in turn, and all gazes were on him. He hummed.

“sorry, wrong floor,” he drawled, but made no move to leave, instead settling further into the chair, where he promptly began to snore. Sans glowered in his direction, but before he could speak, Sans huffed irritably from the sofa.

“i hones'ly don't give a shit about this,” he grumbled, skull sinking further into his palm, and he glared at his violet-clad counterpart, who sneered back, “m'prolly not gonna talk t'any a'you assholes unless i have to, anyway.”

“you didn't take that nap, huh?” Sans quipped from his spot on the couch, and Sans snarled at the both of them, stamping one violet boot on the carpeted floor.

“LET'S GET THIS OVER AND DONE WITH, PLEASE,” he snipped snidely, narrowing his sockets at them, “I WANT TO BE DONE WITH THIS SOON, SO–“ he gestured to the Sans in a blue hoodie, who blinked at him.

Silence settled over to the room for a moment, only broken by Papyrus' snores. He snorted suddenly, shifting in his chair, and Sans glanced around at his alternates, white eye lights darting between them.

“uh, ok,” he said, settling farther into the seat, “you want _me_ to do this?” The Sans seated next to him rolled his red eye lights, scowling at the ceiling.

“WELL, THIS _IS_ YOUR UNIVERSE,” Sans sneered from the front of the room, folding his hands behind his back again, “I AM MERELY ASKING FOR SOME INPUT, HERE.”

“the names'r gonna be stupid,” Sans muttered, shaking his skull.

“IF YOU'RE GOING TO BE SO PESSIMISTIC,” Sans piped up from his armchair, rolling his eye lights, “THEN WHY DON'T YOU JUST LET _US_ DECIDE THE NICKNAMES, WHILE YOU GO... HAVE YOUR NAP?” he finished his statement uncertainly, and Sans growled at him, narrowing his sockets as he whipped his skull around.

“_i don't need a fuckin' nap_,” he snapped viciously, and Sans sighed from his place near the wall, shaking his skull at the ceiling exasperatedly.

“i mean, you might,” Sans said seriously on the couch, and Sans groaned, sinking further against the arm rest.

“LET'S JUST DECIDE ON NICKNAMES!” Sans spoke up again, forcing his grin up at the corners and sitting even straighter in his seat. “ER... THERE IS NOT MUCH YOU CAN DO WITH 'SANS'...” he trailed off, humming thoughtfully. Sans huffed from his seat on the couch and buried his fangs in his hand, glaring at the far wall.

“how about...” Sans shifted slightly in his seat, eye lights sweeping across the floor, “i mean, we're all different colors....” Sans shot him a perplexed look from the wall, and Sans groaned again, shaking his skull.

“OH! I GET IT,” the Sans in the arm chair spoke up, then his brows furrowed, “EXCEPT, WE ARE BOTH BLUE,” he gestured between himself and this universe's Sans with one gloved hand, and the Sans who was now leaning against the wall suddenly sighed.

“OH,” he said, his tone dull. He sent a flat look Sans' way, “SO, THE NICKNAMES _ARE_ GOING TO BE STUPID.”

“well, if _you_ wanna figure 'em out...” Sans pulled one hand out of his hoodie pocket to scratch at his skull.

“NO, I _DON'T_,” Sans replied stiffly, now crossing his arms, his sharp teeth pulling up into a sneer, and Sans huffed a chuckle from his arm chair.

“NEITHER DO I,” he said. Sans continued to keep his red glare trained on the wall.

“an' i mean...” Sans continued, tucking his hand away into his blue hoodie again, “since it's _my_ universe, i _could_ just be sans.”

“oh, come on,” Sans muttered next to him, sharp teeth pulling down further at the corners. He sighed heavily, “what am i, then? red?”

“yep,” Sans said cheerfully from beside him, and he seemed to sink down further into the couch, grumbling too quietly to hear.

“THEN, I SUPPOSE I'M BLUE,” Blue said from his arm chair, once again clasping his hands in front of him.

“so, that's blue, red, an',” he looked at the Sans still standing by the wall, tapping his violet-gloved fingers against his violet scarf rather pointedly. “black,” he said, and his counterpart's face immediately melted into a scowl.

“WHAT?” he blustered, now tugging at his scarf, “WHY?? NO, THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!”

“'course it does,” Sans said with a wink, and Red immediately pushed himself up off the cushions.

“i'm outta here,” he grumbled, while Black continued to sputter by the wall.

“WHY CAN'T I BE–” but at that moment, Papyrus stirred again in his arm chair, pushing himself up slightly on his elbows.

“'ey, red sans,” he said, and Red paused, glaring at him over his shoulder, “yer boss er whatever wants ya t'be down here when they have their meeting.”

“_why??_” Red asked, voice pitching up indignantly, and Papyrus shrugged, “when are they–?? why can't he just–??” Papyrus just shrugged at him again, and Red let out a disgusted noise while Blue hummed nervously from his chair. Black just crossed his arms, glaring with narrowed sockets at Sans.

“guess you won't get that nap,” Sans said, shrugging as well, and Red _seethed_ at him.

“he's upstairs, if ya wanna ask him. but papyrus is out right now, anyway,” Papyrus went on, slumping down across his seat again, “he'll be back later. n'papyrus is out havin' a smoke in the back.”

“A SMOKE OF _WHAT KIND_, EXACTLY??” Blue spoke up suddenly from his chair, while Red ambled back over to the couch with a sigh. Papyrus' teeth quirked up slightly, and he lifted one gloved hand to cover them, making a sound like he was clearing his throat.

“mm, dunno,” he said, his tone decidedly sly as his eye sockets slipped shut. Sans tutted and immediately pushed himself up from his chair, storming from the room, and Papyrus snickered, hunching in on himself slightly.

“PAPYRUS!” Blue yelled as he went, his tone already scolding, and Sans snickered as well, sockets crinkling slightly with amusement.

“well,” Sans hopped off of the couch and hummed, meandering towards the hall, “let me know when he assembles the papyruses. i'm outta here for now, if this is over.”

“I DON'T THINK IT _IS_ OVER,” Black hissed, and Sans turned his skull away to hide his snickering, but otherwise ignored him, continuing out into the hall. A small 'pop' signaled that he had warped to some other location, and Black scoffed, pushing himself aggressively from the wall and storming along towards the door. He paused to scowl at his brother, sockets narrowed. “LAZY MUTT,” he muttered, and then marched away.

“hhhhh, fuck,” Red grumbled, sinking back into the sofa and closing his sockets. Papyrus hummed from the chair. “i'm goin' fer a fuckin' nap.”

“hell yeah,” Papyrus mumbled sleepily, giving him a thumbs up and then promptly flopping his arm back down over his middle, “fuckin' go for it.”

~~~~~~~~

A few hours later, the Papyruses were assembled, three of them situated in various locations around the room, the Papyrus clad in his violet hoodie in the same position he had been hours ago.

“alright, now,” Sans was saying as he made a show of sitting himself down on the sofa, sinking into the cushions of the backrest like he was planning on falling asleep, “guess it's time to figure out this name thing. me n' my–“

“WHY?” asked Papyrus, scowling from the middle of the room, his bright red eye lights zeroed in on the less-threatening version of his brother, who was now grinning patiently at him.

“'cause it's confusing,” he said simply, as Papyrus' real brother came to sit next to him, who the lazy, blue-clad-Sans had dubbed 'Red'. He scowled deeply as he shoved his hands into his pockets and slouched forward on the couch, his posture and expression the exact opposite of his counterpart– tense and angry as opposed to relaxed and content. “i thought you wanted this meeting?”

“ONLY TO ASSERT MY OPINION THAT IT IS _NOT_ CONFUSING,” Papyrus snapped, eye sockets narrowing, his jagged teeth pulling further down into his scowl. Papyrus' cheerful counterpart looked on nervously as he took long strides into the room then, smiling first at the blue-clad Sans, then at Red, and then at the other multiple Papyrus who were already lounging in the room. “AND TO SAY THAT NO MATTER WHAT YOU AND YOUR ALTERNATES HAVE DECIDED, _I_ AM NOT GIVING UP _MY_ NAME.”

“don't have t'give it up, ya baby,” his counterpart with violet eye lights drawled snidely from across the room. He was still sitting sideways across the armchair, his legs tented over one arm, his neck propped up on the other, skull almost sinking into his hoodie. His sharp teeth pulled into a mocking smirk. “jus' gotta use a nickname fer now.”

“JUST UNTIL THIS ALL GETS SORTED!” Papyrus chimed in nervously, wringing his red-gloved hands in front of him, anxious smile still in place. “TO MAKE THINGS– “

“EASIER?” Papyrus glared daggers at him, and the only version of him who hadn't spoken up yet, clad in a reddish-orange hoodie and doing a very good impression of the wall he was leaning against, suddenly tutted, rolling his white eye lights. “WHAT?? AM I REALLY THE ONLY ONE WHO FINDS IT INSULTING TO HAVE TO GIVE UP MY NAME, JUST BECAUSE THESE _IDIOTS_,” and here he glared at the two opposite versions of Sans, and the only ones who were present, currently. Only Red winced, his glare deepening further as he scowled at the carpet. “MESSED UP??”

“yeah,” Papyrus mumbled from the wall, gloved phalanges fiddling with a dog treat he had produced from somewhere within the confines of his hoodie. Papyrus hummed anxiously from his position near the couch, still wringing his hands while Papyrus simmered with rage, jaw popping with how tightly he was clenching his teeth.

“listen. nobody likes the situation,” Sans was speaking again, unmoving from his slouched position on the couch, his grin barely twitching– with what, it was unclear, but Papyrus was almost certain it was amusement, and it did very little to help his terrible mood. “i just wanna get this dealt with. me n' my alternates have already handled our name issue, an'– “

“I AM _NOT_ GIVING UP MY NAME!” Papyrus shouted again, petulantly stamping his foot.

“PLEASE, PAPYRUS,” Papyrus said from his spot near the couch, sockets creasing together with anxiety, “IT IS ONLY FOR A SHORT TIME, AND – “

“AND WHO DECIDES HOW LONG THIS WILL LAST?” Papyrus shot back, turning his livid scowl on his alternate now, “DO THESE MORONS EVEN KNOW WHAT THEY DID _WRONG??_” and he shifted to glare at his brother again, who somehow sank even further forward, as if he hoped to fold in on himself and wink out of existence.

“fuckin'... take it easy, _dumbass_,” Papyrus muttered irritably from the arm chair, and Papyrus whirled on him, sockets wide with rage. “s'nothin' we can do about it fer now, so why the fuck do ya have t'be so whiny about it?”

“_EXCUSE_ ME–“

“s'not even that big a deal,” Papyrus went on, interrupting him, and Papyrus let out a frustrated scoff.

“_YES_, IT IS! I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY WE CAN'T USE _CONTEXT_ TO DECIDE WHO WE'RE SPEAKING TO!” he shouted stubbornly, “IT'S NOT THAT DIFFICULT!”

“not that difficult to just fuckin' use a nickname, either,” Papyrus mumbled from the wall, nibbling on his dog treat.

“_YES, IT_ – “

“al_right_,” Sans said, raising his voice for the first time since this whole thing had started a few days ago, and everyone looked back to him, surprised in spite of themselves at his shift in demeanor. He huffed out a sigh, though his grin hadn't slipped once. “let's just _deal_ with this. please.”

“SANS IS RIGHT,” Papyrus said, now clasping his stilled hands and turning a worried look towards the Papyrus clad in black, “WE CAN... JUST SHORTEN OUR NAME? HOW ABOUT... PAP?”

“ABSOLUTELY NOT,” Papyrus hissed.

“rus?” Sans piped up, voice lowered again, his lazy grin directed towards the scowling Papyrus in the center of the room.

“NO, AGAIN,” Papyrus snapped, but the Papyrus falling asleep in the arm chair perked up and lifted one clawed hand in the air.

“i'll take rus,” he mumbled.

“dibs on pap, then,” said the other, slumping against the wall like he might slip straight to the floor, the dog treat now half-eaten and hanging from his teeth.

“WELL, FINE,” and Papyrus drew himself up mockingly as he continued, “_I_ WILL BE CALLED PAPYRUS.”

“can't be papyrus,” Sans said immediately, shaking his grinning skull, and his red alternate sank further into the couch, muttering something at the carpet. Sans turned his grin on him, as if about to speak, but Pap spoke up before he could, raising his hand slightly.

“what about _pappy?_” he asked, teeth quirking up into a smile, his dog treat now nowhere to be seen. Rus snorted from the chair, skull sinking into his hood as if he could hide his amusement.

“_NEVER_,” Papyrus ground out, and Papyrus made another high, anxious sound.

“listen–“ Sans began, but Papyrus interrupted him, a forced grin curving at his teeth.

“ALRIGHT!” he exclaimed suddenly, and all eyes were on him as he clapped, “I WILL BE PAPPY! THERE, IT IS SETTLED, NOW EVERYTHING IS FINE!”

“bro, come on,” Sans began, but Papyrus huffed a satisfied breath through his nasal cavity, grinning in triumph.

“THERE, SETTLED!” he echoed, dusting his hands, and Pap scoffed from behind him.

“there, baby got his way,” he muttered, and Rus snickered again, hunching in helplessly on himself in the chair.

“fuckin' throws a tantrum and gets what he wants,” Rus added through a laugh, grinning maliciously at Papyrus, who sent a murderous look his way, uncrossing his arms to fist his clawed phalanges threateningly at his sides.

“ya spoiled him, red.” Pap shook his head, completely ignoring Papyrus, and Red looked like he was on the verge of just vanishing from the room.

“knock it off, will ya?” he rumbled, while Papyrus seethed at his alternates, visibly shaking with rage.

“let's call 'im baby, then,” Rus mused, one clawed hand coming to tap against his fanged teeth. “since he didn't like our other suggestions.”

“NOW– PLEASE–“ Pappy cut in, holding his hands up as if prepared to diffuse a conflict, and actually beginning to sweat a little. Sans was looking half as nervous, which meant he was probably more worried than Pappy, and Papyrus seemed to swell with anger, shouting uproariously.

“_WILL THE TWO OF YOU SHUT YOUR FUCKING– _“

“WHAT'S ALL THAT NOISE IN HERE??” Black roared as he stormed into the room, looking very much like a small, angry thunder cloud in his black outfit and faded-violet accessories. He sent a livid glare Sans' way, purple eye lights shrinking slightly as he narrowed his sockets. “MIDDLE OF THE AFTERNOON, SHOUTING AT THE TOP OF YOUR LUNGS! HAVEN'T YOU FINISHED WITH THIS ALREADY??”

“tryin',” Sans said, shrugging unaffectedly, and Papyrus whipped around to face him.

“YES, WE HAVE,” he said insistently, and Black looked from him to Rus, sneering.

“THEN WHO IS WHO?” he asked, tapping the tip of one violet boot on the carpet impatiently.

“I'M PAPPY,” Pappy said quickly, clearly eager to put this matter behind him. Sans huffed out a sigh, rolling his eye lights, but didn't say anything more, apparently not caring enough to argue further.

“WHAT ABOUT PAPYRUS?” Black asked.

“he's papyrus, apparently,” Sans said, his tone suggesting he was a little more than annoyed. Black hummed in acknowledgment.

“AND WHAT ABOUT PAPYRUS AND PAPYRUS?” he went on conversationally.

“papyrus is pap, and papyrus is rus,” Sans said, not even gesturing to either of them, or moving to look in their direction, “respectively.”

“wow, ask about me last,” Rus said in mock-offense from the arm chair, “i'm hurt, m'lord.” Black narrowed his sockets, as if about to respond, but Papyrus beat him to it.

“ARE YOU– “ Papyrus sputtered incredulously from the middle of the room, gesturing towards them in disbelief, “YOU SEE?? THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT! IT'S NOT CONFUSING AT ALL THAT WE SHARE THE SAME NAME!” Black shot him a perplexed look.

“OF COURSE IT IS, DON'T BE RIDICULOUS.” Then, he sneered at Sans as he continued, hands on his hips, “AT LEAST YOU ALL GET A SHORTENED VERSION OF YOURS... THE BUFFOON HERE JUST COLOR-CODED _US_.”

“it's easier,” Sans shrugged.

“I DISAGREE ON PRINCIPLE!” Black exclaimed, while Red's sockets narrowed irritably, “_WHY_ AM I BLACK?? MY MAGIC IS VIOLET, AND YOU NAMED RED _RED_ BECAUSE OF _HIS_ MAGIC, AND YOU NAMED BLUE _BLUE_, AND HIS MAGIC IS _BLUE!_ BUT ME?? I'M _CLEARLY_ VIOLET! I _LIKE_ VIOLET!”

“you wear a lot of black,” Sans said, shrugging, his eye sockets lifting in amusement as Black glared at him.

“SO DOES HE!” Black shot back, swiping a hand violently in Red's direction. Sans looked at his red-gazed counterpart, humming thoughtfully.

“his shirt's red,” was all he said, and Black let out an indignant sputter, gesturing to his own violet scarf and boots with his violet gloves.

“WHATEVER,” he spat nastily, when San's expression only brightened further. Then, he turned on his heel and abruptly left the room. “IT MUST BE NICE TO HAVE SUCH A LONG NAME,” he muttered as he marched away, and Sans chuckled.

“could call you sansy,” he suggested at his normal volume, and even though Black had stormed off quickly, it seemed that he heard him anyway.

“ABSO_LUTELY_ NOT!” he snarled from down the hall, and even Red cracked a smirk before it quickly fell, his gaze not leaving the carpet.

“whelp,” Sans hefted himself up laboriously from the couch, lifting his arms above his head as if to stretch. “i'm goin for a nap, if this is over.”

“Oh, me too,” Pap said, finally pushing himself off of the wall he'd been stuck to. Rus shifted in his chair, humming quietly while Sans shuffled from the room, Pappy still hovering nervously near the sofa. His sockets narrowed as Rus tugged a red joint from his pocket, and Pap stopped mid-step to about-face and head back towards him.

“OUTSIDE,” Pappy snapped, just as Pap was saying, “please share.”

Pap and Rus both blinked in his direction, and then the two of them burst out in laughter before abruptly vanishing into thin air, leaving Pappy, Red, and Papyrus alone in the room.

“WELL,” Papyrus said primly, as Red finally lifted his gaze from the carpet and sent him a tired look. “NOW THAT THAT'S ALL TAKEN CARE OF...”

And, unceremoniously, he swept from the room, without even a glance in anyone's direction. Red huffed out a sigh, finally settling back into the cushions, while Pappy hummed, wringing his hands again and examining him for a moment.

“WELL! I THINK I'D LIKE TO BAKE SOMETHING!” he exclaimed suddenly, and Red turned his skull slightly to just... stare at him.

A beat of silence passed between them.

“fuckin' go for it,” Red said, sounding just as drained as he looked.

**Author's Note:**

> if us!pap and sf!pap give you fred and george vibes, then i accomplished my goal, lmao. i imagine their dynamic would be VERY similar to the twins'  
the line ". . .doing a very good impression of the wall he was leaning against' also reminded me strongly of something else when i wrote it, and i realized it was a variation of something snape said to harry in one of the books  
also, i know black is usually called that way because blue is short for _blueberry_ and black is short for _blackberry_, but i kind of thought sans trolling him would be funnier.  
anyway, thank you for reading!!


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